


What Makes You Happy

by aeternamente



Category: Lizzie Bennet Diaries
Genre: Advice, Friendship, Gen, med school
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-01
Updated: 2013-03-01
Packaged: 2017-12-03 23:02:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/703642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aeternamente/pseuds/aeternamente
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A conversation between Darcy and Bing at Pemberley.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Makes You Happy

**Author's Note:**

> So, I kinda suspected that Bing had dropped out of school, but I've gotten so used to my theories being wrong that I guess I never said anything about it (so I can't prove that I got this one right, boo). But it's an explanation that really works for me. So I figured Bing probably told Darcy about it when he came and visited Pemberley, so this is that.

Darcy frowned and sighed at his cup of coffee. “Bing, this is the second weekend in a row you’ve come to visit. I appreciate the gesture, but don’t you have classes to attend?”

He looked up at his friend, who was sitting across from him at a small table in Pemberley’s in-house café. Bing looked nervous. He’d looked nervous last weekend, too, and Darcy didn’t know what this was all about, but he had a suspicion he’d soon find out.

“That’s kind of what I wanted to talk to you about, only I couldn’t bring myself to do it last week.”

“I thought you wanted to talk about whether you should keep Netherfield,” Darcy said, recalling their previous conversation, in which he’d refrained from giving any definite advice, because he was beginning to see the dangers of having too much control over Bing’s decision-making process.

Bing gave a self-conscious smile. “I said that because I chickened out—because I was afraid of what you’d think of me if I told you what I really want to say.”

Darcy clenched his jaw as a wave of remorse passed over him. He was becoming quite familiar with this sensation, finding himself often in a position of having to rectify past mistakes.

“I’m sorry,” he said, “for whatever I’ve said or done to make you think my opinion of you could be so easily affected. Whatever you have to say, I hope you know that I have a high regard for you and your friendship with me, and that won’t be easily changed.”

Bing nodded and swallowed and took a deep breath. “I dropped out of med school,” he said in a rush, only allowing himself to look up after he had said it, his eyes searching, uncertain.

Darcy was silent for several moments, trying to formulate the most diplomatic way to respond to this announcement. He could not deny that he was disappointed. Bing had invested a substantial amount of time, money, and effort in his studies, and he was so close to completing them, it seemed a waste to give up now. But he decided to reserve his judgment until he knew more.

“What led you to this decision?” he asked, trying to sound more curious than demanding.

“I just… it wasn’t what I wanted to do with my life. I’ve never been at the top of my class, I’ve never really enjoyed memorizing facts for anatomy or bio-chem, or cutting open cadavers, or giving people shots. It’s just what my family wanted, what they expected from me, and I guess I’d always figured I’d come to like it eventually, because I’d be helping people, making them better, making them happy, and that’s what I love to do. But there are people in my classes who love all of it—the studying, the memorizing, everything—and they're really just completely invested in what they’re doing in a way I could never be. They’re exactly where they want to be, or they’re getting there. They’re doing what they love. I mean, it’s kinda like you.”

Darcy blinked. “Like me?”

“Yeah, you love your job. I mean, sometimes you spend too much time on your work, or you get stressed out and need to take a break, but you get so excited about all the projects you’re working on, and you’re so good at seeing potential in people and promoting their creativity, and… and you’re doing what you love and you’re good at it.”

Darcy wasn’t sure what to say to this, but he was pretty sure he was getting distinctly red in the face. “I guess I’ve been pretty lucky…” he finally managed.

“But that’s the thing. That’s not what being a doctor is for me. I’m not good at it, it’s not what I love to do. I love helping people, but… I think I could be better at helping people if I’m not trying to force myself to do something that’s just not right for me.”

Darcy took a moment to absorb everything his friend had just told him. He had always thought he’d understood Bing pretty well—outgoing and engaging in a way Darcy could never hope to be, with a kind and affectionate heart, good at making friends, but bad at making decisions. He thought he’d understood his role in this friendship, as a mentor, a voice of reason, and yet, all this time, he’d been blind to Bing’s unhappiness, his discontent.

Bing, who had been watching Darcy with increasing agitation since finishing his speech, began speaking again. “I mean, I get it if you’re disappointed. Caroline is, too. She spent our entire vacation trying to get me to change my mind, but I wouldn’t do it. I know you want what’s best for me—”

“I do want what’s best for you,” Darcy said. “And you’ve convinced me that it would not be best for you to continue in medical school.”

“Really?” Bing asked, his eyebrows raised in disbelief. “You think so?”

“Yes. Don’t you?”

“Well, yeah, but I didn’t expect you to agree with me. You and Caroline always seem to have the same opinion on these things.”

“I want you to be happy,” Darcy said, “and if being a doctor doesn’t make you happy, you shouldn’t do it.”

Bing nodded. “Thanks, Darcy,” he said, “that means a lot.”

“I, ah…” Darcy hesitated. “I know I haven’t always acted in the interest of your happiness before. I have… some reason to believe that some of my past actions have been…  _misinformed_.”

Bing frowned. “Darcy, what are you—?”

“Jane has been living in Los Angeles for the past several months,” Darcy forced himself to say before he could convince himself it was a bad idea. “I just… thought you should know…”

“Oh…” Bing looked down at his coffee and began absently turning the cup around between his hands. “How long have you known?”

“I’ve known for… some time.”

Bing was silent. His coffee cup made two slow circuits and Darcy watched the progress of the cup’s handle, around and around again, and he wondered what might be going through his friend’s mind, but dared not ask.

“Do you think—” Bing began at length. “Would Lizzie be in her office today?”

Darcy had seen Lizzie entering the building just before he’d come here to meet with Bing. She’d been carrying all of her camera equipment, and Darcy had considered offering to help her with it, but ultimately decided against it. She hadn’t seen him, and he hadn’t made his presence known.

“I believe so,” Darcy said, trying to sound disinterested.

“Good,” Bing said, rising from his seat. “I’d like to talk to her.”

Darcy nodded. “Well, I have a meeting to prepare for, at any rate.” He stood up himself and turned in the direction of his office.

“Darcy,” Bing said.

Darcy turned back.

“Thanks… for everything.”

Darcy smiled. “Good luck, Bing.”

“Yeah, I’ll need it,” Bing said with a laugh and a deprecating roll of the eyes.

“You’ll do just fine,” Darcy said, “I’m sure of it.”


End file.
